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TOPIC: It's complicated...

It's complicated... 5 years 2 months ago #7390

  • fioncelle
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There's something I have been struggling with for quite a while. Though I managed to put things aside, I'm aware that it would haunt me until I find a solution and stick with it.

So now from the beginning... I came to Thailand to be with my gf. We've been together for over 2 years now. I was and am aware that life can always change, life (not only relationships of any kind) have taught me that. I did settle down here in .th, I have a job a place to live, so I'm all right with that one.

As far as my gf goes, there's one big shadow above us. As our relationship went on for a while, she had stated a few times that she'd like to have children, even tough I have told from the very start that I do not want to have kids and never will want to. It seems that she hoped she could change my mind over time, but as this is impossible, things become difficult.

She keeps saying that she loves me, yet I know that her feelings are changing (decreasing?). She sort of admitted that herself, saying it went down from "100% to 80". I've noticed some activities on her fb, where she'd subscribe to sites, adding lots of people as friends, etc... All that might be the result of that unsolved conflict about her wanting kids, plus a bit of a naive view on relationships and how to handle problems. However, she still sticks with me because she might feel guilty or not want to hurt my feelings. So this might go on for some time, along with a 20% of feeling loss every 2 years? That doesn't sound very promising. Yet it seems that things still aren't totally clear, at least on her side.

Right now, it's hard for me to tell where I stand emotionally. I had (and will have) some nightly cryfests ahead (when she's at work), but tears can dry and then things continue the same way they did before. But being in an emotional state kinda stops you from seeing things rationally, that's why I'm posting it here to get some insights from outside... Anyway, thanks for reading.
Last Edit: 5 years 2 months ago by fioncelle.
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Re: It's complicated... 5 years 2 months ago #7391

  • duangkamol
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I hope it will work out for the two of you... I can see both POV and I can't say either is wrong. Best of luck....
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Re: It's complicated... 5 years 1 month ago #7393

  • fioncelle
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Thanks... I have to prepare for both options. However, trust is everything. If that is broken, even a little, it's hard to keep going. It's gonna be painful either way, if I stay with her and keep worrying if she might cheat on me, or if end it sooner than later.

I have no clue where the future will lead me, but at least I decided that I'm gonna stay in .th, despite how things will turn out with her.
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